06 April 2009

"Bite back..." --The All American Rejects

Can we just agree, here and now, that if I ever date you and you are a vampire, that you will bite my neck?*


Not just a graze. Not a nibble. Not a hickey. Oh, you can do all that, too, but you better get around to a bite.** I'm talking chomp city. Because where's the value in dating a vampire otherwise?!

So, by now you can guess which movie I got stuck watching on the flight to Barbados.

Ooo, the teen angst. Ooo, the bleached out features. Ooo, the smoldering intensity.

Yeah, talk about biting.***

* You might as well tell me here and now as this is the kind of thing that's bound to come up. One night you'll be flossing in that annoying way you do--you use way too much elbow--and I'll say "Hey, if you were a vampire would you bite me?" and you'll have to answer me then and there with floss hanging from your teeth, which, trust me, won't help you at all.

** Okay, maybe I'm a wee bit too old for hickeys.

*** This was the better of the two movies I saw. I could, sadly, remember all of Twilight. But, try as I might, I couldn't remember the other film we saw on the trip back at all. It was close to two weeks later when I saw an ad on TV (it's coming out on Blu-Ray) that I realized we had seen The Day the Earth Stood Still on the return flight. Bleah. Really, really bleah. Promise me****, if you're ever Keanu Reeves, that you'll do better than this dreck?

**** Yeah, that's two promises I'm demanding. It's Monday; I'm feeling needy.


PQ said...

I voluntarily went to see that movie because I read the books and thought MAYBE...

But nope. No.

I'm in love with Edward Cullen. Robert Pattinson can suck it with his glittery floury body.

Narm said...

The shiny skin thing was such a huge hole in the entire story it was almost embarrassing.

No wait, what was embarrassing was me being in a theater to see Twilight.

repliderium.com said...

Vampires that don't bite = EPIC FAIL!

Liebchen said...

I saw it theaters, too. *hangs head in shame*

But I'd still rather see it over nearly any Keanu Reeves movie. The man does nothing for me.

Mike said...

Do I HAVE to be a vampire to bite you?

f.B said...

I was promised you're never too old for necking/hickeys; that they got better with age. No? Huh. Oh well. Biting it is.

rs27 said...

As long as the girl is Buffy I will eat her alive.

Not sure that's what I was going for.

Kate said...

Why the obsession with biting all of a sudden? I've liked being bitten for YEARS. Now that it's become trendy, I don't want it anymore.


LiLu said...

You're NEVER too old for a good hickey.

Barbara said...

What is the maximum acceptable age for a hickey?

Malnurtured Snay said...

I try not to roll my eyes when people buy these books at the Bookstore, but I am so judging them.

briankainec.com said...

it's with great sadness that I agreed to download this movie for a friend. I need to get it off my computer as soon as possible else I might actually watch it...

lacochran said...

PQ, Narm: It *was* bad. So bad.

Repliderium.com: Exactly.

Liebchen: (In a Chandler Bing voice:) Could Keanu BE any more wooden?

Mike: Yeah, that would be the rule.

f.B: I appreciate your flexibility. (That's what she said.)

Rs27: Does it make sense while you are writing it?

Kate: You've always been a trend setter.

LiLu, Barbara: Perhaps we should have a roundtable discussion on this.

Malnurtured Snay: Given my taste in books and music, I can't throw the first stone. Oh, wait. I did, didn't I?

Briankainec.com: Curiosity will get the better of you. And then you will be sad. So sad.