07 January 2009

"Ooh Baby Baby" --Smokey Robinson & the Miracles

I once dated a man that smelled like baby oil.

We only went out two, maybe three times. So I never got to the point of asking or observing why he smelled like baby oil.

Truth be told, I use baby oil when I shave my legs (dry skin, if you must know), so, immediately, I knew what it was. And there's much worse smells than baby oil.

Much. Worse. Smells.

We didn't stop dating because of that. Still, it was a bit odd to have a grown man smell of Eau de Baby.

Not that he needed to douse himself in Stetson or Dolce & Gabbana Light Blue Pour Homme* or whatever. I don't need my man to smell like burlap or asphalt or wet sheepdog or whatever else they put in that stuff.

I guess if I could choose a smell for a man, other than fabulous Eau de (Clean) Man, I'd probably go with a food I like, but something non-wimpy. You know, like Eau de Pizza.

I can smell me a lot of pizza.

Talk about irresistible.

*No, I am not making that up. Remember when your dad wore Old Spice, because that's what he received from you every birthday? Talk about making sacrifices for the kids. *shakes head*


Fearless in Toronto said...

I'm saving myself for a man who smells like cookies. Chocolate chip or peanut butter...I'm not that fussy.

Lemmonex said...

Ooh, baby oil is also good as cheap eye make up remover.

I love plain old man smell, though I guess thats different for everyone. Woodsy?

Herb of DC said...

I'm still a Hai Karate man

Narm said...

I smell like cigarettes and regret.

LBluca77 said...

A man that smells like pizza is my dream man!

urban bohemian said...

If I ever go out with someone doused in eau de steak and gin & tonic, I'll be forced to marry him and I'll probably never even realize why.

All I could think when I read this was, "I didn't know L dated Smoove B!" :)

Liebchen said...

Mmm...smelling like cookies is good, but I'm usually with Lem. I can't quite put my finger on it, but just that natural "man" smell.

Matt said...

He probably used the baby oil to jerk off with.

It makes sense that he would do that right before a date, as well.

Think about it.

Bilbo said...

Perhaps he just had a squeaky baby that you never found out about.

fiona said...

Did he too shave his legs?

Kate said...

Matt! Holy sweet Jesus, I SO didn't need to know that.

But it's funny!

And I like good old man smell. I used to love rum and cigarette smell, but not so much anymore.

Mike said...

I'm spreading pizza all over myself right now.

Barbara said...

As long as it's not eau de cigarettes or oily hair, I'm pretty much accepting of any smell (well, maybe I should think about that...)

LiLu said...

Secret Shame Alert!!!:

I LOVE the smell of Old Spice.

f.B said...

I wear cologne every time I leave the house. I use it to mute the smell of awesomeness that I admit, humbly, can at times be overwhelming. I also selfishly like that no one else I've met wears the cologne I do. Reminds me of having been the only guy in my high school not wearing CK One or Polo Sport. Free spirit, I am. Weird like no other, I am.

emma said...

Eau de Grilled Filet Mignon works too.

lacochran said...

Fearless in Toronto, Liebchen: Mmm, cookies!

Lemmonex: Wasn't he an owl? What do owls smell like? Dead field mice?

Herb of DC: *squints sideways* Now, they don't still make that so are you churning it out in your basement?

Narm: With a touch of Powder Fresh Secret.

LBluca77: Million dollar idea.

Urban Bohemian, Kate, Emma: :)

Matt: Um, thanks. Hadn't thought of that. Now, I will. Forever.

Bilbo: Good riddance, then. The squeaky ones are the worst!

Fiona: Could be!

Mike: I was wondering who would take the bait. :)

Barbara: Trust me. You want to think about that.

LiLu: Daddy issues?

f.B: Never mute your awesomeness. As Marianne Williamson said "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure..."