16 August 2008

They censored what?

[Kid Rock wondering how to get Pamela Anderson back.]

Here is the chorus to Kid Rock's current song* where he is supposedly reminiscing about his teenage years in Michigan:

And we were trying different things
We were smoking funny things
Making love out by the lake to our favorite song
Sipping whiskey out the bottle, not thinking 'bout tomorrow
Singing Sweet home Alabama all summer long

I mention this because on the trip to Jersey last week, we heard this song on the radio approximately 4,338 times. You know, approximately. Now, here's the pop quiz part: which part of this lyric is offensive?

[insert annoying Jeopardy timer music here]

Got your answer? Good. Read on.

My answer: None of it. If you can get past the fact that he's not exactly Dr. Seuss with the rhymes, I think all of it makes for a reasonable chorus.**

One could argue that a teenager shouldn't be doing any of that. Okay, if you're gonna get all prissy and parenty fine. YOU NEVER LET ME DO ANYTHING!!

Um, sorry. Not sure where that came from. Moving on.

If you answered: "smoking", you, too, can be a radio censor. One radio station played a version with the word "smoking" dropped out so it was "We were [empty pause] funny things". How incredibly lame is that?

Is smoking pot worse than drinking whiskey from the bottle or having underage sex? As a teenager, it's all illegal.

And, for that matter, why drop "smoking"? Why not drop "funny"?

What does this do except make kids think the song is cool because it has banned words? At least on one station. Every other station played it as written.

*shakes head* Wacky censors.

* If you can call it "his", since he samples heavily from both "Sweet Home Alabama" and "Werewolves of London. "

** As a kid, I loved Dr. Seuss. As an adult, I had to accept it was pretty much over once he got the restraining order.


Gilahi said...

Actually, the only offensive part of that song is Kid Rock. I think his middle name is something like "Lesstalentthana", or "Aboutasinterestingasa", or "Uglierthana".

AbbotOfUnreason said...

Is it really illegal for teenagers to have sex with each other?

Bilbo said...

I've always wondered about music censors. I'm a huge Jimmy Buffett fan, and I've always cringed at the "mainstream radio version" of his song "Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes" that takes the line -

"Good times and riches
And son-of-a-bitches,
I've seen more than I can recall."

And changes it to -

"Good times and riches
Some brooms and some switches,
I've seen more than I can recall."

Which makes absolutely no sense (sound of teeth grinding).

Reya Mellicker said...

We are manipulated all the time, aren't we? My goodness, the powers that be believe us all to be complete idiots.

lacochran's evil twin said...

Gilahi: We can't all be Flavor Flav.

Abbott: I'm thinkin' yeah. Maybe not in West Virginia.

Bilbo: Parrothead.

Reya: And then some.

Jamie said...

I'm pretty sure this is just Clear Channel being your religious-right nanny. Like Wal-Mart editing movies. I remembered when they censored Tom Petty... "Let's get to the point.. lets rollmmmr msmrjjawrarasdamklww" Is there anything illegal about saying "roll another joint" on the radio? Only if you're on a radio station owned by bible thumpers. I mean there's hardly a song from the 70's that DOESN'T mention drugs.

lacochran said...

Jamie: Ah, the 70s. When you could buy a bong at Spencer's.

Anonymous said...

Today in Palm Springs, 100.5FM bleeps out the word "smoking" and "whiskey"!!! I was shocked and angry.