25 August 2008

CVS goes bankrupt. Film at 11.

Friday I run out at lunch and visit the CVS.* I bypass the library (that aisle where everyone mills around reading magazines and tilting their heads sideways) and I pick up a couple items*** that total ~$25. But wait! I am a CVS club member and membership has it's privileges. I have a sheet of CVS coupons.

They are quite the variety, coupon-wise. Some are good for this week. Some next. Some are specific to the things you can buy (CVS brand items only.) Some are "get $3 off when you buy $15 worth" while others are "get $4 off when you buy $20 worth." Some are the same coupon repeated. Some are not. And there's fine print!

Yeah, I know: Who can be bothered?

Not me.

I plunk down the whole sheet and say "whatever you can do..." and leave it to the cashier to determine what the best deal is.

She studies the sheet and gives me a "$4 off $20 worth" credit. I'm now down to ~$21.

Me: Thank you.

But she's not done. She does a second $4 off $20 worth coupon.

Me, thinking "Huh?!", as I'm pretty sure they're not supposed to be combinable: Uh, thank you!

But she's not done. Now, that she sees the machine has no problem accepting multiple coupons, she's taking it as a personal challenge. We're down to ~$16 at this point and she explains that she can apply the $3 off $15 worth coupon. And she does.

Me: Thank you!!

I'm beginning to think they're going to pay me for these items.

At this point, she apologizes--APOLOGIZES--that she can do no more due to the specific item required by the coupon or the date it's effective.

Me: I think you did great!

She gives me back the remaining coupons, pointing out the ones I can use at a later date. I give her one more big "thank you" and I leave the CVS with ~$25 worth of stuff for ~$13.

* That translates to Rite Aid, Walgreens or whatever the pharmacy is in your neck of the woods.**

** Just where is the "neck of the woods"? Aren't there better parts of the body with which to describe some portion of a forest? Go ahead, think about it. I'll wait.

*** If I tell you what I got, you won't be surprised when you open your birthday present. Man, I hope I got the right thickness. I've said too much.


Gilahi said...

I think your problem is with your final conclusion. What this tells you is that CVS jacks up prices so much that you actually left the store with about $6.00 worth of stuff of $13.00. Although that's still better than getting $6.00 worth of stuff for $25.00.

SingLikeSassy said...

This is hilarious. I use those coupons all of the time because I agree with the pp.

morninglight mama said...

Hmph. I guess I should start saving those things- even when you purchase 2 greeting cards, a bottle of hairspray and a gatorade, you get a receipt that's approximately 4 feet long, yet I usually just shove all the coupons into the bag to be trashed later. You have taught me a valuable lesson here! :)

charlotteharris said...

Wow, you should think about hitting Bed Bath and Beyond after work to see how many of those ubiquitous 20% off coupons you can get them to take!

LivitLuvit said...

You MUST not have been in downtown DC when this happened... every CVS I've been to (7th and H, 15th and K, Dupont, Vermont and M) has always had the absolute slowest, could-not-care-less ne'er do wells behind the registers. Where is this haven of customer service??

Herb of DC said...

Yes please, please reveal the address!

lacochran said...

Gilahi: You may have something there.

SingLikeSassy: I use them when I remember them.

Morninglight Mama: Yes! Ridiculously long receipts.

CharlotteHarris: I must have 5 of there 20% off coupons, now. Does anybody pay regular price?

Livitluvit & Herb of DC: Greenbelt Road by Hanover Parkway. In Greenbelt, MD. I don't guarantee that all of the personnel are this generous.

Reya Mellicker said...

Such a deal!

The universe does love you.

Bilbo said...

I, too, shop at CVS pretty much every day, and each day my register receipt is 18 feet long because of all the coupons attached. Of course, the coupons are all for things I don't need (nail polish remover, for pete's sake?), or for $4 off on a $20 purchase when my normal purchase is less than $5. I'm cutting all those 18-foot receipts into long strips for use as confetti at new years.

lacochran said...

Reya: I feel it!

Bilbo: If you shop every day and spend less than $5, perhaps you could hold off on getting your CVS fix until you get to the $20 worth of stuff level. Also, those receipts can be compressed into nice fireplace logs. Ahhh, toasty.

QuickStepper said...

CVS's motto should be "CVS - where everything is free". I have only paid pennies for everything at CVS for almost a year now - often they even pay me to take things out (I am not kidding here). They are by far the cheapest store in town if you know how to combine coupons.

lacochran said...

Quickstepper: And I thought this was an isolated incident! Guess I'll have to amass more coupons and give it another whirl!

QuickStepper said...

Check out www.hotcouponworld.com or www.slickdeals.net
You will not believe it. The trick is to combine coupons - buy something on sale and use a CVS coupon, a manufacturer's coupon and pay with an Extra Care Buck and try to buy something that gives you another Extra Care Buck back again to use on your next item.

lacochran said...

Quickstepper: Thanks, again!