Assorted Flotsam

Assorted flotsam: the hate edition.

• We know Blogger screwed up and blew away all but one comment on my last post and that this general screwing up happened to a lot of people. If people comment and the comments disappear, does a tree fall in a forest? And if Blogger is at the heart of deforestation, should we be angrier about that or about Canada foisting Celine Dion on us?
  

• It was the 10 year mark so we had no choice. We sent our passports in for renewal. It'll likely take about 6 weeks. Meanwhile we have no passports. And I hate this. HATE this. Suppose I want to do some crimes and flee the country? Then what? There is no box on the renewal form that has "I'm keeping the old passport until you send me the new one because I may want to do some crimes and flee the country" and this is what's wrong with the U.S. today. The terrorists have won.

• Can I tell you how much I hate the mylife.com commercial where the lady says "Seven people?!" *giggle* "...looking for ME?!" *giggle*giggle* Yuh, because I want to be hassled by more people. Right. Lady, people looking for you isn't always a good thing. Sure, it could be that sweet Jimmy who picked a daisy for you in third grade but more likely it's that weird guy from Accounting who always stares at your breasts. Is the mylife.com target demographic the same demographic that asks telemarketers to put them on a "please call" list?

Yeah, okay. I'm embracing my inner-curmudgeon. Tomorrow, unicorns and double rainbows.

Maybe unicorns barfing double rainbows. Baby steps.

Assorted Flotsam

• Why is it that every rug store I've ever gone past is continually going out of business? Never out of business, mind you. Just going, going... going. Is this a state law? When you get your lease, do they also issue you an "Everything Must Go" banner? Good economy, bad economy, it doesn't seem to matter. Maybe it's just a standard part of the melodrama. Reminds me of when I bought my Tabriz and asked if there was some room to negotiate the price. The response from the merchant, his arms extended toward me, wrists up, was, "Why don't you just slash my wrists?"

• I had plenty of time during SNOW2010 to check in on the Food Network and what I've come to understand is that, like movie critics, some chefs/cooks are going to jive with my tastes and some aren't. Paula and Ina use way too much fat and sugar for me, the Neelys use too much bacon*, etc. But that doesn't mean they're not entertaining. You can always rank on Bobby Flay's accent or Giada's bobblehead. And each and every one of them makes a great drinking game. You can see how many times they say: "Doesn't that look delish?", "This is one of my favorites", "...lemon to brighten the dish", "I wish you could smell this", etc. The other thing I've noticed is that one cooking show will tell you to add oil to pasta water, another will tell you not to. One cooking show will tell you to rinse mushrooms and another will tell you not to. Where is the Wiki judgy person for Food Network?
  

• Do they no longer feel it's important to heat restrooms in restaurants these days? Has anyone else noticed the drop in temps in even fancy restaurant restrooms? Brrrrrrrr.
  

• We saw a woman on the Metro the other day. She wasn't indigent (unless this was her first day). She was dressed conservatively and sturdily. Reminiscent of nun-wear, if you will... sensible. And she sat quietly for all of a minute before standing, turning toward the other passengers, and saying, loudly, "Are you visitors? Out this window is the Jefferson Memorial and here you can see there's been lots of rain so the water is high..." She proceeded to do a rudimentary travelogue. I nudged the Husband warily. He whispered, "She's with people." I shook my head, "No, she's alone." He looked back and, with some thought, said, "And she always will be." After another minute of awkwardness, she sat down and pulled out a pamphlet that had a profile of Jesus on the cover, complete with thorny crown. I feared we might get preached to--it wouldn't be the first time on the Metro. She sat for two more minutes before she stood and began talking to the man standing by the door with the baby carriage. His face was a mix of embarrassment and politeness--you know, the half-smile and the squinty, averted eyes. She didn't proselytizing, just shared. She was going to get off at this particular exit and go to mass on this street and...blahblahblah. What occurred to me was: Are people who are this lonely more likely to immerse themselves in religion, where they have to be accepted?
  

* That's right. I said it.

Assorted Flotsam

Boss: Your tag is out. *tucking tag back into the back of my dress*

Me, irritated: That's my signature look!


*****

Do you have a cat that looks like Hitler (a kitler)?



Or do you enjoy viewing these kitlers? Then get yourself over to www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com

So, um, this counts as an entry as far as NaBloPoMo is concerned, right?


Up high!
Aw, go on. Do it.

*grin* I knew you wouldn't leave me hanging.

Need more of a high-five fix? How about we go to the video...



PS Special thanks to whomever added yesterday's post to StumbleUpon. May your life be cupcake-rich.

Assorted Flotsam

• There are certain things I just can't do. I can't not flush a toilet and I can't not sign a check. I've tried. Mum asks me to write out some checks for her as her hand isn't so steady now. I'll fill out a check --the date, the amount-- thinking "Don't sign, don't sign, don't sign", and then? I sign it. And then I curse. Similarly, I go into the bathroom hearing the shower running and I think "Don't flush, don't flush, don't flush" and then I do what nature requires, and then? I flush. Automatically. And then I hear cursing.
  

• Party philosophy: 10% food, 10% drinks, 15% weather, 5% magic and 60% people. You bring an interesting mix of people together and the rest doesn't matter. What's your party philosophy?
  

• I don't generally like to mess with symbols that are near and dear to people's hearts. That's why, even though I'm not a Christian, I get a little irked when people co-opt the Christian fish symbol. But I am impressed with the variety of riffs out there. I've seen the Darwin version, the Evolve version, the Gefilte version, the Flying Spaghetti Monster version, the Sushi version, and today I saw one filled in with "'N' Chips".

• That's a Milwaukee's Best (aka cheapass Miller) beer truck I spotted on the road. I snapped a picture of it because of the slogan, "BREWED FOR A MAN'S TASTE." First, it supposes men have taste, an interesting supposition. (Ooooo, slam!) Second, I spent a good bit of time trying to think how that beer might be brewed. Did it taste of poker tables and cigars? Dick Cheney's hunting rifle? The sweat of the NFL? Pamela Anderson? What?

PS New poll up there on the right. Check it out.