Shoe shopping / Remember when you could buy something at a department store?

I need a pair of shoes. Some form of pump, black, stylish. Not too hard, right?

Macy's is having a Labor Day sale. We stop in. The shoe department looks like this:


Still, a sale is a sale. I select four shoes as possibilities and try to locate a salesperson. There is one at the cash register with an endless line with which to deal. I occasionally spot another fellow doing this sort of thing:


from the back room.

Hubby: Looks like there are a lot of people waiting. Maybe if you sit down...?

I clear the considerable collection of shoe filler paper balls, used peds (ew), and other shoe-related debris from a chair and sit. I think fondly of my childhood years when you could go into any department store and find it neat, organized, clean, pleasant. Meanwhile...

Leaves fall. Snow falls. Little birds hatch. Nothing happens at Macy's.

Hubby: Maybe sitting isn't the way to go...?

I stand up and spot the prairie dog fellow and he inadvertently makes eye contact! Ha! Got him! He gives me the universal signal that he will be with me in one minute. I nod, smile.

We go gray. We develop cataracts. We consider hip replacement surgery. Nothing happens at Macy's.

I find prairie dog fellow and he sees me and gives me the same signal again.

Cities rise and fall. Oceans cover the earth. Nothing happens at Macy's.

I drop the shoes with the rest of the mess and we leave. Five minutes later we are in DSW. I buy a pair of shoes. Of course, at this point, I'm stuck wearing orthopedic support shoes but I got a really sweet pair that offsets my walker.