Stay Home/"Cheeseburger in Paradise" --Jimmy Buffett

We are four women chatting at a work social gathering. Those words don't really go together, do they? Work social. Doesn't even sound right. But there we are. Workmates. On company time. Trying our best to pretend we're social mates. Haha! What fun.*

Anyway, the conversation turns to one person's sister in Hawaii and this leads to who has been to Hawaii, and so on.

Pretty young thing (PYT): You know if you really want to go someplace beautiful you should go to Grand Cayman. It's the best island!

[This is met with assorted ooo's and aahh's]

PYT: Yeah, I went with my Mom. It was great because it was the most Americanized of the islands we went to in the Caribbean.

Me: "Most Americanized"? What do you mean?

PYT: They had McDonald's and places like that, so it was great. 'Cause some times you really want a cheeseburger.

Oy.

So, she's here:



and here:



and what makes her happy?

This:



I like a pampered holiday as much as the next person (okay, more) but I sure as heck don't need an American fast food meal to make me happy. 51 weeks of McDonald's haute cuisine isn't enough?

Am I wrong in thinking that there's something seriously wrong with this chick?



* See, if you were there, we would exchange a look that says "Can you believe this?! We have to get the eff out of here." 'Cause you're like that. It's great that you're like that. Thanks for being like that.

Intuition only helps if you listen to it

In the "not funny but true" category...

Three weeks ago we are on I95, driving back from Jersey.

Me: I'm thinking I should check my tires at some point.

Hubby: Oh? Why?

Me: I dunno... Do they check the tire pressure when they do the oil change and stuff?

Hubby: I think so.

Me: Yeah, they probably do. But it doesn't take long to check so I should probably do that if I'm feeling like I should do that.

[Insert image of pages fluttering off the calendar here]

A few days ago, I'm leaving work in the evening and my car is an island unto itself. Good time to check the tires. I find they are at 33, 30, 42 (!), and 26 (!). Not good. Certainly not good for the wear. I wonder how they've gotten to this point, especially the one at 42.

I look at the manual and it says the proper level is 32. Well, at least two of the four are close. I drive to a service station and balance them out.

Last night, I am leaving work at 7:30 and the tire that was lowest days ago, looks low again. I check it and it is at 28. I drive again to a service station and fill the tire to the proper level. It's at this point that I notice a great big nail in the tread. Yes, that would explain the slow leak. I decide to overfill the tire a bit.

I think: It's too late to get it fixed tonight. Maybe at lunch tomorrow.

I also think: I wonder how long I can drive on a tire with a nail in it and not have a blow out?

As I drive home, I try to prepare myself for a blow out, as if that's possible. I keep my hands at 10 and 2. I try to stay away from other traffic. I slow down to 65ish, which is the slowest pace I can still keep with the flow. I get home without a blow out. Today I get to work, in the pouring rain, without a blow out.

I consider that I could have had this nail for weeks, maybe months and not know it. I think about all the times I've been driving long distances. I think about all the times I'm been driving over 80 mph.

At lunchtime today, I got to a service station. The tire now sports a plug.

So, no dramatic conclusion to this story but I will say this...

Next time the universe tells me to check my tires, I'm listening.