"Baby, stop all your pretendin'" --Kelly Clarkson

The lovely and talented Little Ms Blogger (have you seen the icing on this cupcake?) has tagged me for a meme. (Thanks, Chica!) As I have spent the day learning more about sexy, sexy pivot tables than anyone in the free world has a right to know, this is a fine time to do a meme.

The concept: "Sometimes you can learn more about a person by what they don’t tell you. Sometimes you can learn a lot from the things they just make up. If you are tagged with this Meme, lie to me. Then tag 7 other folks (one for each deadly sin) and hope they can lie."

Pride:
What is your biggest contribution to the world?

I invented the intersection of sloth and lust. Come Sunday afternoon, you'll thank me.

Envy
What do your coworkers have that you wish was yours?

They have the ability to make mountains out of molehills. Sadly, my molehills are just hills that moles live in. It's hard to build a molehill getaway.


Gluttony
What did you eat last night?

Well, if you count chewing my way through the restraints, ... oh... um... let's see...

I found out I didn't get chosen for the new reality show "So You Think You Can Spot Weld" so I ate my heart out.

Lust
What really lights your fire?

Men who don't know when I'm interested in them and they ignore me. That's hot.

Anger
What is the last thing that really pissed you off?

Peace, love and understanding. As Elvis Costello notes, there's nothing funny about that.

Greed
Name something you hoard and keep from others:

My brilliance. Wouldn't want to intimidate anyone.

Sloth
What’s the laziest thing you ever did?




(See what I did there?)


I'm tagging the people behind the spiffin' blogs: travelin through, SuburbanFizz, Fresh Muddy Waters, Learning to Fly, hey pretty, fever, and Living the life in the LBC. Of course they don't have to do it, but we'll all be silently judging them if they don't.

Ketchup Fraud

I was the victim of a shamockery this past weekend. It's not too late for you to learn from my mistake. For the love/hate of Emeril, don't let this happen to you.*

In the midsts of our travels we hit a chain for bites and booze.** I looked over and saw this (pictured) ketchup bottle. I like ketchup (no matter how it's spelled) and I don't care who knows it. It's sweet and tomatoey and all-Americanly perfect on fries. Yeah, I'll do malt vinegar but they're our allies.

Me: Isn't that nice! A new bottle of ketchup for us! I don't think I've ever seen a new, full bottle like this at a restaurant before! I feel special!***

Hubby, picks up ketchup: It's not full. The bottle is opaque. This is a third full at best.

Me: Bastards.

I blame W for leading the country down a path of lies and ultimate disillusion. I fear for motherhood and apple pie next.



* You don't see much of Emeril these days. Hard to believe catch phrases like "BAM!" and "Pork Fat Rules" failed to continue to inspire the country.

** Not necessarily in that order.

*** I'm always exclamationy when I feel special. Sometimes the neighbors complain.