"I'm not pristine, I'm no queen" --Fergie

Hi there. Yeah, I'm back.

It's been a wild and woolly coupla weeks. I won't bore you with the details. Suffice to say there's been laughter and tears. There's been hospital visits* and glitter cards**.

There's been Cabernet with a head on it, too. I took this shot after a few minutes, when, even though it had subsided considerably, that bubbly froth continued to hang on, unwanted, like a Seth Rogan project.


Sorry, it's a little fuzzy. The wine glass is actually a wine plastic.***

At least I didn't have to skimp on the foodstuffs. Mmmm, Land o Lakes Butter... Wait, what?

Wow, that's pretty blurry, too. Let's try again...


What do you mean, you still can't read it? Have you been drinking Cabernet with a head on it? That says "Fresh Buttery Taste Spread" ...mmmmMMMMmmmm, nummy.



* If you're looking for inspiration to get back in shape, go visit someone in the hospital. Nothing will inspire you to exercise more. Unfortunately, as unfancy as I am--even I won't drop and give you twenty on a hospital floor. I have done push-ups on a hotel room floor. Disgusting? Sure. But probably not deadly. Hmmm, sounds like a good question du jour: Would you exercise on a hotel room floor?

** Can we stop with the glitter encrusted holiday cards? I keep trying to wash this stuff off. It's like it's two days after I've been at a club with a sixteen year old. I've said too much.

*** What does one call a glass made of plastic? Oh, yeah: "tacky."