I've seen some pretty unbelievable things in movies. Flying monkeys,
wealthy Richard Gere falling in love with hooker Julia Roberts, all
those mother-effin snakes on a plane... suffice to say that Hollywood
has stretched my acceptance of what is possible until my brain is as
rubbery as Newt Gingrich's wedding vows.
But last night... *shakes head in disgust* ...last night, we watched The Emperor's Club.
This is a mediocre movie in which Kevin Kline plays a teacher at an
exclusive boys prep school. That I can buy, despite the very
distracting fact that Kevin Kline has no lips. This is almost as
distracting as the fact that Whoopi Goldberg has no eyebrows. See?
Check it. None.
Just a line where his lips are supposed to be. When he kisses you, is it like kissing grandpa without his teeth in? Do you get enveloped by nose, chin and cheek?
Regardless, Kevin Kline, teacher, prep school--check.
What I can't buy, no matter what anybody says, is the time lapse in the film that shows this:
becoming this:
In what universe does dorky Jesse Eisenberg grow up to be sex symbol Patrick Dempsey? Who the heck was in charge of this casting? Stevie Wonder?
Question du jour: What's the absolute stupidest thing you've ever seen in a movie?
Oh, and just because it's my blog and I can, here's another gratuitous shot of Patrick Dempsey:
You're welcome.
