"I wanna be high, so high..." --Lionel Richie

I can distinctly remember a college suite-mate, junior year, saying that she wanted to take a shower and then plopping down on the sofa. When one of us asked her why she wasn't going to take her shower, she said, "I have to get psyched to get wet."

Really? You're 21 and a shower is too much for you? Gotta work up a plan? Maybe limber up in anticipation of those first droplets shocking your body? Get your head in the right state for the deluge? Do a few visualization practice showers? Or, maybe, start with a little water splashing in the sink, like the old ladies at the public pool?

This was also the same chick who had a bong hit before her first class. Every. Single. Day. Her major was early education. Yeah, teaching little kids.

Assuming she did get her teaching certificate, the kids she taught should be hitting the workforce right about now. It all starts to make sense, doesn't it...