"I got more than I could ask for" -- Grand Funk Railroad

You'll probably think less of me (what else is new?) but I hate this time of year. I mean I really hate it.

Yes, I'm thankful. I have a lush life. And I know it's nothing to take for granted. And I have you. Amazing you! It's pretty damn great and I don't mean to underplay it.

And yet... of all the times of the year, this is the worst for me. The light is fading and the temperature is dropping (it's already in the 30s.) And if it's not gonna snow a foot such that work closes for the day and I can stay home, guilt-free, and do, oh, 15 minutes of cross country skiing and spend the rest of the day curled up in front of the fire, what's the point? If I've got to scrape the ice off my windshield and trudge through the bitter cold to earn my living, what's the freakin' point?*

And this is also the time of year when we slog through department stores, online bazaars and catalogues.

Me: *pointing to a Horton* Horton! You think [loved one] would like a Horton?

Him: Would you?

Me: Um, yeah. I think I would.

Him: Okay, get it.

Me: No, it's complete and utter crap.

Him: *pointing* Here's a marshmallow bazooka. It actually fires marshmallows. You think [same loved one] would like that?

Me: I do.

Him: Really?

Me: Yes, but I fear for the dog.

Him: Poor dog.

Me: Poor, poor dog.

And so we continue wandering aimlessly through the nightmare that is holiday gift giving, examining and discarding various items, waiting for inspiration to strike for gifts for loved ones who we should know better than we do. And we buy extra presents for the dog. Poor dog.

It leaves me feeling a little like this:



except with less attractive markings.

This is decidedly different from most of the year when I feel like this:



Oh, sure. When the cat does it, it's cute. When I do it, I have "anger issues."

Whatever.

So, um, I guess this is my lurvly way of saying Happy Thanksgiving.

Wishing you and yours blah-de-blah-blah-blah.


PS Go look at Sean's adorable kitten and remember all that is good in the world.


* Don't just sit there, answer me when I ask you rhetorical questions. [Said a la Napoleon Dynamite:] God!