It dices! It slices!

Ever noticed that there's a point in exercise infomercials where the announcer will say "...and it stores practically anywhere!" ? Then the exercise model will roll or slide the equipment either into a closet or under a bed. Have you ever seen so many empty closets and platform beds? Who's sleeping on these beds that you need a ladder to climb into? These beds are SO high, you could sleep under them. And if these people actually burned off energy cleaning out these now sparklingly vacant closets, would they really need an exercise machine?

Perhaps I'm a bit too literal.

Perhaps.