12 November 2008

"Won't you please, please help me" --The Beatles

[A rare glimpse of our treasure trove. And pay no attention to that enormous spaghetti squash of ours or the glorious cow sponge holder featured in the background, although I will say: the cow sponge holder? One of my most prized possessions. Forget the Lladro, the Wedgewood, the Waterford. Give me the cow. Cows are trendy. Forever trendy. Love the cow.]

Want to know the secret to our success?

Dill weed.

No, I'm not calling you a name.*

Dill weed is (apparently) what we have decided to invest heavily in during tough economic times. Some people invest in gold. Some in stocks. Some in pork bellies.** Not us. We put our savings into a much less lucrative and much less competitive market. We've bought dill weed and plenty of it.

Here's the thing: At some point, one of us said "I'm going to make this recipe and it calls for dill weed" and off we went to the store without even considering the idea that maybe, just maybe, we'd already bought dill weed in the distant past and said nearly full bottle of dill weed was languishing in the back of the spice cabinet, behind the millions of more popular spices and dried herbs. How else to explain three fairly full containers? ARGH!

That's right. Not only did we duplicate, we triplicated.

And that's not all!

We've similarly cornered the market on Ground Double Superfine Mustard, too.***

We now have a lifetime supply of both. So, we're looking for a return on our considerable investment.

Since Suze "Tough Love" Orman says it is a financial waste to not know what you own such that you wind up duplicating (don't tell her we triplicated, I shudder at the volume of wrath she would hurl at us), please forward recipes that call for both of these items and plenty of them. You know, Curried Monkfish with Dill Weed and Mustard or "Mmmm, You Can Really Taste the Dillweed and Mustard" Cheesecake... that sort of thing.

Thanks much!

* Unless, of course, you are a dill weed. Then you deserve it. Dill weed.

** When did the belly get to be the most prized part? I always thought the curlicue tail was a piggy's most delightful asset.

*** Adviser's tip: Stay away from the Ground Single Superfine Mustard. That's just stupid.


brian said...

One of my most mortifying moments was during my last move. An ex was helping me pack up my kitchen and commented that I had crystallized ginger as he put it in a box. 15 minutes later he commented on it again, which I thought was odd. 10 minutes later, same thing. I thought he was crazy or joking with me, but no, I had three little containers of them for a recipe that I never even made.

I think I might still have them to this day. I don't think that pear & ginger pie is ever gonna get baked.

Gilahi said...

Seems like a perfect opportunity for "Spaghetti Squash with Dill Weed and Mustard".

Matt said...

I dont think I've had the pleasure of ever tasting Dill Weed...

Though I'm sure it's delicious...because it sounds that way.

AbbotOfUnreason said...

For us it used to be cardamom.

I tried to convince the Brunette that we should computerize or kitchen inventory, but she didn't go for it. But may now that the iPhone and iTouch are out there it would be more useful.

Maybe it's time to make a site called grocerything, a librarything for groceries. Geeky business idea!

Kristin said...

Dijon mustard. Apparently, I buy it on every single trip to the store and use it about four times a year, which is why I can never remember if I still have any.

fiona said...

Dill Recipes
• American Potato Cutlets
• Anchovy Dip
• Anchovy Swiss Toasts
• Asparagus Potato Salad
• Avocado Yoghurt Dip
• Baked Oysters and Spinach
• Baked Whitefish with Dill and Tomato Cucumber Relish
• Beet-Pink Salad
• Blue Cheese Potato Cakes
• Cabbage Mushroom Pie
• Carrots Vichy
• Caviar and Cheese Stuffed Snow Peas
• Champagne Dill Carrots
• Cheese-Filled Phyllo Pastry (Cigarro Burek)
• Citrus Mayonnaise
• Clam Stuffed Trout
• Colorful Shrimp Spread
• Corn Bread Stuffed Cabbage
• Corn and Cheese Pudding
• Corned Beef & Cabbage
• Crab Puffs
• Crab Mousse
• Crab Souffle Tarts
• Crab Stuffed Cornish Hens
• Creamed Horseradish Dill Sauce
• Creamy Mustard-Dill Sauce
• Deep-Fried Clams
• Dill Potato Salad
• Dilled Peach Swordfish
• Dilled Potato Chowder (24)
• Easy Baked Shrimp
• Easy Herbed Grilled Salmon
That should use up some before the weekend. Get cooking girl!

Kate said...

Roasted Red Pepper Flakes.

Now, when I'm making a recipe, I actually look in the cupboard, but there's always those times I find the recipe at work and go to the grocery store right after. Which means poultry seasoning and parsley flakes galore....

LBluca77 said...

I don't know what Dill Weed is so thank you for calling me a Dill Weed. Poo Poo head!!

rs27 said...

I own two can openers.

I'll sell you one for 9 million dollars.

Take that Suze!

J.M. Tewkesbury said...

The key to keeping track of spices? Get those little circular stickers, write the name of the bottle's contents and stick it to the top of the bottle. This has saved me from buying a second bottle of White Pepper, a fourth bottle of Vietnamese Cinnamon, and another bottle of Shallot Salt.

As for Fiona and her list, she rocks!

Narm said...

I'm just going to assume I am one of the actual dill weeds.

f.B said...

I try to avoid this problem by telling people "I buy everything fresh." I say it enough to believe it. But then I open the cupboard and find six cans of Old Bay and three Italian Seasonings things. Thank god Top Chef starts again tonight. I need some ideas.

Herb of DC said...

Suze Orman is such a fake. I know for a fact she leases her spices.

My word verification here today is flamm so I am thinking you should make "I Can't Believe It's Not Mustard and Dill Weed Flamm."

Mike said...

I was going to step up and be the dill weed but Narm beat me to it. Probably for a good reason.

lacochran said...

Brian, AbbotofUnreason, Kristin, Kate, f.B: Nice to know it's not just me. :)

Gilahi: Mmmmm.

Matt: You betcha!

Fiona: Wow! You actually sent ideas. What a sweetheart!

Lbluca77: Boogerhead!

Rs27: I'll see your two can openers and raise you four whisks!

J. M. Tewkesbury: Vietnamese cinnamon? Shallot salt? Dinner at Tewkesbury's!

Narm, Mike: Dill weed. (Hey, if you're going to own it...)

Herb of DC: Wouldn't that be flammbe?

Hughes ap Williams said...

I just read your blog after posting "Investing in Food." Suze should be proud of us both.

"Approved" as she would say!