- I have paid a man to feel my breasts.* Okay, he was a surgeon and he was determining if the lumps were likely cancerous (they were not) but it did occur to me, as this guy was giving me the once, twice, thrice over that I was paying him to get to second base. This is one situation where you don't want to hear from the guy the next day.**
- In a related "Wait, what are we paying for??" moment... We pay for termite control even though they never find termites. By that, I mean, we have termite bait stations inside and outside and someone comes out to the house every month or two and checks the stations. They wave a device over the station. The device beeps. They've never found any activity in any of the stations. For all I know, they're playing Donkey Kong on those devices.*** Then, again, maybe the termites are getting smarter and going around the stations. So maybe we're paying for termite control of the termite control stations.
* TMI? Well, it is Thursday.
** Speaking of the big C, was that the reason Charlie Brown had no hair? You'd think the other kids would have been a little nicer to him.
*** Okay, nobody plays Donkey Kong anymore even though there are 22 (!) references to Donkey Kong in the Urban Dictionary not including "It's on like..."