Congrats on not ascending. You heathen, you. Maybe we all didn't ascend because of this woman...
I was at a nail salon this weekend. I was led to a pedicure chair (sans fish) and noticed the woman next to me because: A) she had her knock-off designer purse on the little table part attached to MY chair and it was sticking out over MY arm rest, B) she was muttering into her cell phone the entire hour she was there and C) she had arrived in three inch, leopard print pumps.
On A): you know I pushed that sucker way over to her side and off my arm rest without even making eye contact.
On B): Eh. I think it's rude to the technician but I guess it's no worse than reading a magazine. Plus, muttering is preferable to shouting.
On C): I have nothing against leopard print pumps but time and place, People. Who goes to get a pedicure in pumps? You go in sandals and shorts! This is widely known. But, apparently, not to this woman.
So, as luck would have it, when my mani/pedi (which always sounds like "maxipad" to me) was done, I was guided to a drying station chair right next to this woman. The dryers ran. Then her technician came over and sprayed her toes with drying spray and walked away. I heard her say into the phone "I'm not going to put on my shoes because I don't think the polish is dry yet." With that, she got up, carrying her pumps, paid at the counter and walked out IN THE FLIP-FLOPS THE SALON PUT ON HER FEET!
I looked around to see if anyone else had watched this theft transpire besides me... nope. I considered calling to one of the technicians. But... I did nothing. After all, maybe you're allowed to take those minipad (hey, we're working a theme here)-thin flip-flops even though there's a return bin for them at the drying station. Maybe she's worked out a deal to bring them back next time. Or... maybe she's just a selfish bitch.
Which leads us to multiple questions du jour: Are those flip-flops yours to take? Should I have said something? If so, to whom? Am I an accessory? Don't tase me, Bro!