- Can we all agree that Whitney Houston sang the National Anthem better than anyone ever has or ever will, and for anyone else to sing it is a crime? No, really. It should be illegal. Everyone else, at best, falls pathetically short and, more often, butchers it. I say, from now on, at baseball games, they just project Whitney on the Jumbotron. Done. Who's with me?
- There are long yellow lights in these parts but they're not infinite. Why is it that when we wind up running a red light, we feel better when someone runs it worse behind us? And, around here, 90% of the time, someone does. As if our illegal behavior is somehow less illegal than theirs.
- One of the local places to see big names in music has been renamed. It was bad enough when you were going to see someone perform at the Nissan Pavilion but, now, you have the honor of having friendship-ending conversations like this one:
You: I know! I just saw them! They were amazing!
Friend: Really? Where did you see them?
Friend: What did you say?
You, unable to make eye contact: I saw them at Jiffy Lube Live.
Ex-friend: *turns and walks away*
- There are two kinds of Scrabble players in the world. Those that time their moves, memorize the Scrabble dictionary, and hoard "u"s and those that don't. The two types should never, ever play together. Nothing. Not even hopscotch.
- Here's the scenario. You're trying to eat reasonably healthy. This may be because you know you will be on a tropical beach in a few weeks wearing very little. You order a sandwich and instead of the chips that come with it, you pay the extra money for a small salad. Your order comes. There, in your order, is the bag of chips. You complain that you were supposed to get a small salad in place of the chips. The clerk tells you he's given you both. Do you a) keep and eat the chips? b) keep the chips but do not eat them? c) politely give the chips back? or d) have the biggest hissy-fit Atlanta Bread Company has ever seen?