13 May 2014

"You don't send me flowers" --Barbra Streisand and Neil Diamond




I did something a little different Friday. I took a Craigslist gig. Once I got used to the snugness of the  French maid's outfit, it wasn't so bad. *shakes head* Those wacky French.

Okay, maybe not. What I did do: I took a day off from my standard work and helped a local florist get their Mother's Day deliveries done. It was a long day for not a lot of money but it was nice making people happy with the deliveries. And they were happy! Very!

Here's the thing... I delivered 23 bouquets/arrangements and got lots of thank yous but not one tip. Not a one. I smiled and was pleasant. The deliveries were beautiful. So, what the heck? Which leads me to the...

Question du jour: When you get a delivery, do you tip?


06 May 2014

"Shout! Shout! Let it all out!" --Tears for Fears




















Hubs and I are at the library. We hear two men at the computers chatting.

Remarkably unattractive, unusually loud 60-something man: So, she wound up with EVERYthing. The HOUSE. The BONDS. EVERYthing. I TRIED to tell him but he wouldn't listen. ...That's why I'M not getting married. NO way.

Hubs and I exchange a look: Yeah, that's why.

It's not that you're ugly. It's not that you're so pale and doughy Pillsbury would hire you. It's not that you don't possess an inside voice. It's not that you're freer with your opinions than Rush Limbaugh. It's not because you think women are desperate for your money. No, it's because you CHOOSE to not be married.

What a prize. Hear the weeping of all the single women?



Question  #1: Why are the most adamant people the most clueless?

Question #2: What kind of friend consoles his buddy by saying, "I told you she was no good and you never should have married her"?

Question #3: Does anyone remember when libraries were quiet places and librarians would actually SHUSH you if you did more than whisper?