17 October 2012

"Real Men of Genius" --presented by Bud Light

So, yeah, last month we went back to Cozumel.  It was rough:

We stayed at an all-inclusive which meant that we could have drinks or food any time we wanted.  I say this not to be all "Look at me, I'm fancier than Ann Romney's Cadillacs" but because it's germane to what I'm going to tell you.

While we were at this all-inclusive hotel, there were Texans in the next room.  They brought their own beer to an all-inclusive.  Rather than drink either of the beer options offered (two different bottled Dos Equis) or anything else from the full service bars (high end liquor, mixed drinks, wine), they toted around their cooler of Bud Lights.  That's right.  These folks, who paid in advance for the joy of having whatever they wanted delivered to them on the beach, passed up Dos Equis in favor of their own Bud Light in cans.  I've heard of brand loyal but WTF?

Questions du jour:  What have you passed up that was free in favor of something that wasn't?  Do you ever cringe at American behavior when you are traveling?

15 October 2012

"Hey, leader, strike up the band!" --Gershwin & Gershwin

We are standing in the AT&T store talking to the clerk at the counter.

Me:  I'm going to go with the iPhone.

Hubs:  The 4?  Or are you going to wait weeks for the 5?

Before I can answer the guy behind me takes it out.*  That's right, he pulls his iPhone 5 out of his pocket and interjects:  Wait for the 5, it's totally worth it!  You'll love it.  Here!  Feel it!

He motions to hand his phone to Hubs.

Hubs to Guy:  I don't love anything about Apple.  In fact I think they're the great Satan.**

We can feel all eyes turning to look at us.

Guy:  *pause*  What are you an Android guy?

Hubs:  That's right.

Guy, dismissively:  Oh, there's no comparison.

Hubs:  I couldn't agree more!

Guy: *blink* ***

Later, after the purchase is complete, and we are in the car...

Me, incredulous:  You announced that you thought Apple was the great Satan in an AT&T store.  Why would you say that?!  You know Apple isn't the great Satan.  That's always been Bill Gates!

Hubs:  I just wanted to shut him up.  I could just tell he was one of those people who camped out so he could be one of the first people to get one.  He was just looking for an opportunity to show it off.

So, anyway, things change. When everybody had a Blackberry, I had a Palm.  When all the cool kids bought an iPhone, I bought an Android.  Now everyone is jumping on the iPhone 5 bandwagon and I'm tired of being bandwagon-less.  

So, yeah, the iPhone 5 is on its way.

God have mercy on my soul.

Question du jour:  Just how damn cute are lemmings?

ELAINE: He took it out.
JERRY: (confused) He what?
ELAINE: He took (blows on her glasses twice to clean them) it out.

JERRY: He took what out?


JERRY: He took It, Out?

ELAINE: Yessiree Bob.

JERRY: He couldn't.

ELAINE: He did.

JERRY: (motions of making out) Well you were involved in some sort of amorous...

ELAINE: Noooo.

JERRY: You mean he just


JERRY: Are you sure?

ELAINE: Oh quite.

JERRY: There was no mistaking it?

ELAINE: (looks straight into his eyes) Jerry.

JERRY: So you were talking, (Elaine makes an agreement sound "mmm") you're having pleasant conversation, (Elaine makes an agreement sound "mmm") then all of sudden...






** If the AT&T store were an old west saloon, this is when the piano player would stop playing. 

*** Piano player resumes music, people start talking, and Miss Kitty considers investing in sarsaparilla futures.